“Employers, landlords, and cops in New York City are now legally required to use people’s pronouns of choice when addressing them — and restaurants are no longer allowed to deny service to men just because they refused to wear a tie.”
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Shit I’ve Heard High Schoolers Say
- Why stop at capitalism? Destroy everything.
- Guys it’s been three weeks since I’ve eaten a vegetable
- At least we have memes to dull the pain of existence
- An AP student: Oh my god I thought seven was less than six
- (while filling the cap of their water bottle with water) SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS SHOTS
- friend one: If all your friends jumped off a bridge wou-
friend two: probably - I’M GONNA GO HOME AND DRINK A WHOLE GLASS OF WEED
- If cows ruled the world would they drink human milk?
- student: my calculator is broken
teacher: your calculator isn’t broken, you’re broken - no actually I think you have to be of age to be considered a cougar
- (during math class on the second floor) student 1: so like how far do you think the distance is from that window to the ground?
student 2: enough - teacher: has anyone ever been to New Orleans?
Student: does Popeyes count? - my word count on this paper isn’t very high but I certainly am
- we’re in adult limbo. I’m not a teen and I’m not an adult. I’M SUFFERING, THAT’S WHAT I AM!
- Look at my… (swings leg up to show shorts) not pants
Dogs can be our best friends, but the cat will never tell the police where the marijuana is.
“I am learning that the difference between a garden and a graveyard is only what you choose to put in the ground.”
—
Rudy Francisco, “The Heart and the Fist”
Performing at his book release party at Icehouse in Minneapolis. Want Button Poetry to come to your city? You can help make it possible!
when you drive your chevy to the levee but the levee is dry and you see the good old boys drinking whiskey and rye
unbelievablecat